International Photographers Association of Los Angeles 洛杉磯國際攝影家協會

Dear Tim
shall by too dull doll by too jack won
dolphin long can Jim shall by too low
shall by too when dull low, doll car low
dolphin long doll Ham Eason
"more power!"

没看懂？其实中文是：

第二天
小白兔到大白兔家去玩
大灰狼看见小白兔了
小白兔闻到了，躲开了
大灰狼大喊一声
“莫跑！”

很有才华

问问Michelle，看她的学生里有没有这么有才的。

补充几个

万恶淫为首
　 　while in well show
　　
　　 棒，真是棒！
　　Bond, James Bond
　 　
　　 上帝
　 　Song deer
　
杰克斯洛伐克
　　 jack~slow fuck~
　
　　 楼主太牛逼了
Low jewel tell new bee low ！！！！！！！！！！！！　

接下来

春眠不觉晓
chum mean budge shell。
处处闻啼鸟
True true one till now
夜来风雨声
yell line phone you shine
花落知多少！
hello check do shall


床前明月光
chance cheer manning you ground
疑似地上霜
efface T-shirt sewing
举头望明月
june tole warming yell
低头思故乡
detail school shine

这些也蛮有趣的

欢迎小草莓来沙龙散步

有点关联性，贴这儿吧。

邓小平真是料事如神

八十年代，邓小平访美，召开记者招待会，正好翻译不在，美国老记想考考邓小平的英语水平，
便说： 请问美国第一任总统叫什么名字？

　　邓小平英语水平比较呆板，便想按中国人的习俗，见面应该先问姓，便操着四川口音说：我姓邓 （ washington ）。

　　美国老记认为这个问题太简单，便又说：请问，您夫人和孩子到美国都干了些什么？

　　邓小平又想问完姓，该问名了吧，就回答说：小平（shopping）。

　　老记们又问：那么他们是用什么交通工具？

　　邓小平又按中国习俗，认为他们在问年龄，就回答：八十（bus）。

　　老记哗然，又问：那么中国台湾下一任总统会是谁？

　　邓小平等来等去，翻译还没有来，便回答说：你等会儿（李登辉）。

　　老记再次哗然，这么敏感的政治问题也回答得如此轻松，便又问：那李登辉后边呢？

　　邓小平有些不耐烦说：随便啦（水扁，陈水扁）。

　　老记又问：请问将来取代美国星球大战计划的会是什么？

　　邓小平很不耐烦，便骂说：他妈的（TMD）!

　　老记们看看翻译快要来了，便抓紧时间问最后一个问题：您觉得21世纪初世界面临的最大问题是什么？

　　邓小平极其不耐烦，心想这些美国记者们怎么这么不识趣，没完没了的问个不停，沉下脸反问道：啥事（SARS）？

　　二十多年后，美国记者感慨说：邓小平真是一代伟人，料事如神!

还有那Rice、Hu哥和bush的故事。

转帖一个类似的笑话：

Why Chinese shouldn't have English names

Caller : Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan (anyone)?
Operator : Yes, you can speak to me.
Caller : No, I want to speak to Annie Wan (anyone)!
Operator : You are talking to someone! Who is this?
Caller : I'm Sam Wan (Someone). And I need to talk to Annie Wan (anyone)! It's urgent.
Operator : I know you are someone and you want to talk to anyone! But what's this urgent matter about?
Caller : Well... just tell my sister Annie Wan (anyone) that our brother Noel Wan (no one) has involved in an accident. Noel Wan (no one) got injured and now Noel Wan (no one) is being sent to the hospital. Right now, Avery Wan (everyone) is on his way to the hospital.
Operator : Look if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital, then the accident isn't an urgen t matter! You may find this hilarious but I don't have time for this!
Caller : You are so rude! Who are you?
Operator : I'm Saw Lee (Sorry).
Caller : Yes! You should be sorry. Now give me your name!!!

ok, 既然约稿，就配合一下，有点长，看得不耐烦就 shut down your PC

这是一个老笑话了，
不过今天我每读一遍，都乐得不行。

Secretary : - Mr. President, Condoleeza Rice is here to see you.
George B. : - Good, send her in.
Secretary : - Yessir.

(Hangs up. Condi enters.)

Condoleeza : - Good morning, Mr. President.
George B. : - Oh Condoleeza, nice to see you. What’s happening?
Condoleeza : - Well, Mr. President, I have the report here about the new leader in China.
George B. : - Great, Condi. Lay it on me.
Condoleeza : - Mr. President, Hu is the new leader of China.
George B. : - Well, that’s what I want to know.
Condoleeza : - But that’s what I’m telling you, Mr. President.
George B. : - Well, that’s what I’m asking you, Condie. Who is the new leader of China?
Condoleeza : - Yes.
George B. : - I mean the fellow’s name.
Condoleeza : - Hu.
George B. : - The guy in China.
Condoleeza : - Hu.
George B. : - The new leader of China.
Condoleeza : - Hu.
George B. : - The Chinaman!
Condoleeza : - Hu is leading China, Mr. President.
George B. : - Whaddya’ asking me for?
Condoleeza : - I’m telling you Hu is leading China.
George B. : - Well, I’m asking you, Condie. Who is leading China?
Condoleeza : - That’s the man’s name.
George B. : - That’s who’s name?
Condoleeza : - Yes.

(Pause.)

George B. : - Will you or will you not tell me the name of the new leader of China?
Condoleeza : - Yes, sir.
George B. : - Yassir? Yassir Arafat is in China? I thought he was in the Middle East.
Condoleeza : - That’s correct.
George B. : - Then who is in China?
Condoleeza : - Yes, sir.
George B. : - Yassir is in China?
Condoleeza : - No, sir.
George B. : - Then who is?
Condoleeza : - Yes, sir.
George B. : - Yassir?
Condoleeza : - No, sir.

(Pause. Crumples paper)

George B. : - Condi, you’re starting to piss me off now, and it’s not ’cause you’re black neither. I need to know the name of the new leader of China. So why don’t you get me the Secretary General of the United Nations on the phone.
Condoleeza : - Kofi Annan?
George B. : - No, thanks. And Condi, call me George. Stop with that ebonics crap.
Condoleeza : - You want Kofi?
George B. : - No.
Condoleeza : - You don’t want Kofi.
George B. : - No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass of milk. And then get me the U.N.
Condoleeza : - Yes, sir.
George B. : - Not Yassir! The guy at the United Nations.
Condoleeza : - Kofi?
George B. : - Milk! Will you please make that call?
Condoleeza : - And call who?
George B. : - Well, who is the guy at the U.N?
Condoleeza : - No, Hu is the guy in China.
George B. : - Will you stay out of China?!
Condoleeza : - Yes, sir.
George B. : - And stay out of the Middle East! Just get me the guy at the U.N.
Condoleeza : - Kofi.
George B. : - All right! With cream and two sugars. Now get on the phone.

(Condi picks up the phone.)

Condoleeza : - Hello. Rice, here.
George B. : - Rice? Good idea. And get a couple of egg rolls, too, Condi. Maybe we should send some to the guy in China. And the Middle East. Can you get chinese food in the Middle East? I don’t know.

看之前坐稳了，先

最强的中国式英语
1． we two who and who ？咱俩谁跟谁阿
2 ． how are you ? how old are you? 怎么是你，怎么老是你？
3 ． you don’t bird me,I don’t bird you　你不 鸟我，我也 不 鸟你
4 ．you have seed I will give you some color to see see，brothers ！ together up ！ 你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧，兄弟们，一起上！
5 ． hello everybody! if you have something to say,then say!if you have nothing to say,go home!! 有事起奏，无事退朝
6 ． you me you me 彼此彼此
7 ． You Give Me Stop!! 你给我站住！
8 ． know is know noknow is noknow 知之为知之，不知为不知 …
9 ． WATCH SISTER 表妹
10 ．dragon born dragon,chicken born chicken,mouse’s sons can make hole!! 龙生龙，凤生凤 ，老鼠的儿子会打洞！
11 ． American Chinese not enough　美中不足
12 ．one car come one car go ,two car pengpeng,people die 车祸现场描述
13 ． heart flower angry open 心花怒放
14 ． go past no mistake past 走过路过，不要错过

15 ．小明： I am sorry!
　　老外： I am sorry too!
　　小明： I am sorry three!
　　老外： What are you sorry for?
　　小明： I am sorry five!
　　　　
16 ． If you want money,I have no; if you want life,I have one!
　　　　
　　　　要钱没有，要命一条

17 ． I call Li old big. toyear 25. 我叫李老大，今年 25 。
　　　　
18 ． you have two down son 。你有两下子。

　　　　

有趣